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Question of the Week



What's Your Excuse for Not Attending Synagogue?


Question:

Rabbi, do you know why I don't go to synagogue? I used to go, but I started to notice that in my synagogue, the rich people get more noticed and average people like me are overlooked. So I stopped going. If you need to be wealthy to be respected, I want no part of it. Am I right or wrong?

Answer:

You are the third person this week to explain to me why they don't go to synagogue. This happens to me all the time. At almost every function I attend, a wedding, kid's birthday party or communal gathering, someone comes up to me and says, "Rabbi, do you know why I don't go to synagogue...."

They feel the need to share with me their particular Jewish gripe I have never asked anyone why they don't go to synagogue. I don't even know these people. And yet they feel the need to share with me their particular Jewish gripe, either about the unfriendly rabbi or the arrogant cantor, the grandfather who forced them to pray or the G‑d who didn't answer their prayers.

It's funny, I don't feel the need to justify to my dentist why I never go to him, or the local gym why they never see me. And yet when people see a rabbi they are overcome with an urge to explain their absence from synagogue.

Mind you, the people who do attend synagogue don't seem to have a good reason why they come. Even someone who has not been to synagogue in years can rock up to a service, and without any justification for their sudden appearance, they walk in, take a prayer book and sit down as if they always belonged there.

Because they do belong there.I am here because I am Jewish, and going to synagogue is Jewish A Jew needs no reason to be in synagogue. There is no explanation necessary. Most of the time, they themselves don't know why they started coming to synagogue. And so they offer no rationalization. You only need a reason not to go to synagogue. But to go, no reason is required. I am here because I am Jewish, and going to synagogue is Jewish.

This is why I love hearing those alibis people present for not being in synagogue. A Jew needs a reason not to connect to Judaism. Some may have pretty good reasons, like yours. But they are reasons nonetheless. A Jew needs no reason to connect to Judaism. It is who we are.

If you don't like your synagogue, find another one. Until you do, all the justifications in the world won't change the fact that you're a Jew, and a Jew wants to be Jewish.

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By Aron Moss   More articles...  |   RSS Listing of Newest Articles by this Author
Rabbi Aron Moss teaches Kabbalah, Talmud and practical Judaism in Sydney, Australia and is a frequent contributor to Chabad.org.

The content on this page is copyrighted by the author, publisher and/or Chabad.org, and is produced by our content partner, Chabad.org. If you enjoyed this article, we encourage you to distribute it further, provided that you comply with the copyright policy.
 

17 Comments Posted  |  Post A Comment
Reader Comments
Latest Comments:
Posted: Sep 6, 2010
The good that the synagogue provides, the good that the Rabbis provide, the extreme good that Torah observant Jews provide is far-reaching beyond their community.
It touches the entire world. This is blessings to the world that only the Jews have the priviledge of giving. The L-rd is wise in all His dealings.
If there is envy, it is because they do not understand how the L-rd chooses to work His blessings on mankind.
Attend. Attend. It is way more than just a little community. It is the world.
Posted By Anonymous, calgary, ab

Posted: Sep 6, 2010
Alexandra in Denver
As the mother of four daughters who all went through a princess phase, your comment made me laugh out loud!

Your chances of marrying non-Jewish royalty are next to zero... but your opportunity to discover your own royalty as a "daughter of a King" is always available.
Posted By Sarah, New York, NY

Posted: Sep 6, 2010
What's Your Excuse for Not Attending Synagogue?
I think one of the MANY problems is the lack of sensitivity Rabbis have for the "individual" shul go-er. People laugh at all these "reasons" for not going to shul, but wake up, more and more people are experiencing the same things. It's great that you've mastered the chochma, bina and daat (wisdom, understanding, and knowledge -- together these make up the acronym "chabad"), but what about the rest of the attributes that make up a human? Are we just pieces of ice? Smiling at someone and giving them your seat is much more powerful than mumbling stuff you memorized.

Another one of the many issues... Its funny how out of all the days of the year, most synagogues choose Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur to ask for cover charge. The days when most unaffiliated jews decide to go to synagogue. Basically that perpetuates the stereo-type these unaffiliated jews had all along... its all about money. IM IN NO WAY SAYING LIFE SHOULD BE FREE! All Im saying is that synagogues should re-work their finances and fund raising, so they dont have to charge on those days. ChaBaD gets that.
Posted By Moshe Wise
via chabad.ca



 

   
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